I think I've recovered from my messy meltdown, I'll consider it a learning experience, that I need to find a way to help cats but not have it occupy every waking moment. I'm thankful to have people to listen to me and who will help. I'm extremely fortunate to have a wonderful husband who picks up the slack at home and waits for gaps in my monologues on cats so he can insert something else into the conversation.
I have a plan now for the restaurant kittens, all it requires is time to trap them. I slept today until 6:30 a.m., very exciting, about to hit the road for cat sitting, and then cat transport from east to west to east.
I talked to another tired trapper last night who had 3 ferals (not in crates) recovering in her bathroom so that helped me feel not as crazy, or at least in good company.